Due to violations of the chancellor's order (and the governor's now-defunct order), the lakefront is now closed. The violators were naughty sailing team members who decided to do a little "racing practice" on their own despite the standing restrictions. How they got ahold of sails, we're not quite sure. Now no one will be able to sail for at least another month, and probably much longer.
The governor's order was recently nullified by the Republican-controlled "supreme court", a.k.a. den of rats, but Chancellor Blank stare's order curtailing activities on campus was not. Since last week the entire Union and Hoofer area including the canopy has been fenced off like a construction zone. To say it's bizarre would be an understatement. We blame the sailing team members, but in fairness, we probably wouldn't have been able to sail (officially) until July anyway, and there were other factors too in the chancellor's newest order.
So here are some things you can do in lieu of Hoofer sailing:
1. Stay at home and play with your little man.
2. Dig out that scantily-clad Barbie® doll you got for winning Commodore's Cup a few years ago and play with that.
3. Play around with a sailing simulator. Think of it as practice for this fall's online learning.
4. Play video games.
5. Attend this year's unofficial Pirate's Day event!
For info, email the commodore or the puppetmaster. By using private boats, we can circumvent the University's order and get sloshed while doing it!
One problem with sailing by the rulez is that it is invariably done with people who are not "part of your household" and thus everyone must remain at a safe distance, which is impossible on most boats. Even on the large keelboats, it's impractical. Hence the UW's closure of official sailing.
Would you even want to go sailing or hang out at a Friday social while wearing a surgical mask, and with everyone else wearing one too? That is just so messed up. Well you don't have to wear a mask on private boats!
If all this isn't disturbing, here's the latest depressing rhetoric from the chancellor:
https://chancellor.wisc.edu/blog/blanks-slate-planning-for-a-safe-return-to-campus/
It's going to be a summer unlike any we've seen before.
Tuesday, May 26, 2020
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