CROOK OF THE MONTH:
Daniel Georges Sutton--slander, obstruction, sexual harassment. WHEREABOUTS: unknown.
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Click for a message from the Wis. Union director!
Mark Guthier: 20 yrs, 20 accomplishments. Since becoming Wis. Union director in 2001, Mr. Guthier has:
1. Removed all public phones at the Union.
2. Added dozens of security cameras.
3. Paved over most of the remaining grass on the Terrace.
4. Forced a $200 million fee increase on students.
5. Altered Union policies to give himself total authority.
6. Destroyed Union South.
7. Lost his license to practice law.
8. Added password login on all computers to bar visitors from using them.
9. Committed multiple felonies.
10. Trained his student employees to commit crimes.
11. Paved over any remaining grass on the Terrace.
12. Demolished Hoofers for no reason.
13. Rebuilt Hoofers in state-penitentary style (concrete block, high security, etc.)
14. Taken de facto control of Hoofers by altering Union rules ("I Am Altering the Deal, Pray I Don't Alter It Any Further!")
15. Installed magnetic card access for all areas.
16. Installed dozens more surveillance cameras.
17. Trained a new crop of student employees in the art of stalking, harassment, and surveillance.
18. become a child molestater.
19. Committed more crimes and civil rights violations.
20. Contributed to two Hoofer Sailing Club deaths.
Congratulations Mark!
Church Key was kind of weird but cool, like being at a bar in the 1950s or something. And I would have to say, easier to refresh your drink there than at Hoofers. Too bad a few people couldn't make it, maybe they were under 21?
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