April Fools

Winter is baaaack, making sailing seem as far away as ever, so to lighten things up, here's a list of Wisconsin's "10 favoritemost sports" based on observations accumulated over the course of many years:

1. Gambling. It's a great way to make an easy buck.
2. Chipmunk Hockey--using a small roadkill as the puck.
3. Hunting. Wisconsinites will shoot anything that moves.
"THIS AD PAID FOR BY DICK'S GUNS, BAKERY, AND BAIT SHOP."
4. Farting a tune. Required to graduate the 8th grade in Wisconsin.
5. Mud Wrestling--fully clothed. Wisconsinites don't like to show off their fat bodies (and usually it's two men fighting over beer or gambling debts).
6. Jello Slurping. It's a great source of protein too! And try this variation: jello made from pureed deer meat. (believe it)
7. Motorboating. Lucky there are no manatees in Wis. lakes.
8. Animal Love. Some Wisconsinites will pork anything that has antlers and fits in the trunk.
9. Ice Fishing. It's exciting because you never know when you're gonna fall through!
10. Bowling. It's indoors, doesn't require any exertion, and doesn't take any brains... what more could ya ask for? "Now an official part of Commodore's Cup!"

And what about sailing..? Although it is popular around Hoofers, motorboats outnumber sailboats in Madison by a ratio of more than 10 to 1. Of course, Wisconsin's very favorite pastime is watching the Packers, but sitting in a stadium isn't quite a sport.

NOTE: this blog does not condone any of these "sports" or much of the other stuff that goes on around Hoofers and throughout Wisconsin.