Friday, June 14, 2019

And you thought Hoofers only taught sailing?

The Hoofer Sailing Club, established in 1939, is a collection of students and community members working together an unsupervised sociology experiment authorized by the Wisconsin Union, UW-Madison. Here you can learn the arts of manipulation, how to slander people to advance your own position or harm rivals, how to "cook the books", and so on.

As a paying "club member", you won't actually become a club member--you'll be a customer, but that's okay (for us). We are the instructors and club officers who have been selected for our superior party skills and/or alcohol tolerance.* Fortunately (for us), we have immunity from prosecution should you be injured and want to sue. People shouldn't be held responsible for their actions if they're state employees, right?

Luckily for you, sailing is safer than rock climbing or bungee jumping, but injuries are to be expected. In the past, we've had students get hit in the head by the boom--hundreds of times, on various types of boat, with some of those resulting in concussions and permanent injury. Do a google search for "flying jibe" if you want to learn more. Since 2015, there have been two deaths in Hoofer Sailing. One was caused by an instructor, the other by the UW Rescue service. But hey, hundreds of other people went out sailing and didn't get killed. Those are pretty good odds, right?

NOTE that the club's official site falsely advertises many aspects of "club" membership. For instance, the site states that:

1. you'll be joining a "club". This implies you'll have equal say, standing, comparable benefits, or something like that, but nothing could be further from the truth. You'll be a customer, giving money to other individuals who have lots of benefits, none of which you will have.

2. That you can "teach others to sail". In fact, you are not allowed** to teach anyone how to sail unless formally approved as a Hoofer instructor! If you try it, you'll be kicked out of the club, and we'll keep your money.

3. That you can get your deposit back. Good luck with that because Hoofer employees actively scheme how to keep customers (paying club members) from getting their deposits back.

4. That HSC is a social organization where you can make great new friends. Mostly that's for instructors and club officers--the real club--who take advantage of their positions in every way possible. If you're just a plebe (a customer), heh, good luck impressing anyone in a dinghy or as crew on a keelboat. If you can somehow manage to become commodore, you can really take advantage and get the girls (more on that in our next post).

5. Most people who join only want to take a few lessons. That's absurd. Most people want to take many more, at least initially, but either the lessons they want are always full, or they get scared away (see above). The real club (instructors+BOC) love those people because we get to keep their $200 membership fee!


6. That Hoofers doesn't discriminate. Unfortunately, the club does discriminate illegally. For one example, see the comments here.

So join Hoofers now! Just don't sign up for sailing--try kayaking, SCUBA, or something else instead. Better yet, get the heck out of Madison this summer and go see the world!

*Alcohol has been officially banned on board Hoofer boats since 2015, although there's no law against getting hammered on shore and then going sailing. Nor has the no-alcohol policy stopped some club leaders and instructors from taking beer and liquor on board.
**Hoofer Sailing has been changing web URLs, removing documents, sanitizing BOC minutes, and so on, perhaps to cover their tracks. That is how crooks operate. The link in #2 above is to the 2014 Ground School Manual--the latest that's online as of the date of this post (which alone should tell you something). As of June 2019, the club's official manual site has removed all manuals, ostensibly to be revised (why didn't we do this in the off-season??). If the above link to the 2014 GS Manual becomes disabled, let us know and we'll post a copy someplace.
†Not all BOC and instructors are criminals, but too many are.

34 comments:

  1. While I can testify as a past BOC member that 1, 2, 3, 5 and 6 are 100% correct, I take issue a bit with 4. It's funny that Fleet Commander seems to think that the only way to make friends is impressing them with ratings. Sometimes you can meet people and like them even if they just take some lessons.

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  2. The alpha males with upper fleet ratings will always attract the fecund females away from the dinghy boys. It is the way of things.

    As Tony Montana so wisely said to his friend Manny Ribera, "In this Sailing Club, you gotta make the ratings first. Then when you get the ratings, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the women."

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  3. Basically true, but you don't really need any ratings to become commodore. The alpha fish in a small puddle still gets whatever females swim in that puddle.

    To Anonymous @ 7:25, are you an instructor? Sure you can like someone if they have no ratings at all, provided they are totally hot, however ratings on the big boats unquestionably give you status and authority. Not that skippering one of these junky T-10's should impress anyone, but new female undergrads looking for their Mrs. degree don't know that.

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  4. This is all sadly true. and the Discrimination needs to come to an end. I was and instructor, I've seen it first hand.

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  5. Ah,I see how it is now. It's not that the sailing club is an insider ballgame that has you guys all hot and bothered. It's that you're not on the team, and it's blocking your sexual access to 18 year old girls.
    Those comments on here about old men stalking young women are suddenly making more sense.

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    Replies
    1. Swing and a miss. Many of us would like to sail boats, fix them and maintain them again, but cannot any longer because new club policy that prevents us from sailing even tho we were life long members, but our minor defects are "unpleasant"

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    2. Im 65, I walk with a cane occasionally. and was told 2 years ago, I should not be here anymore, Hoofers is not handicapped accessible. but is a charity with funding for accessibility sailors. I don't care about 18 yo girls, my passions are sailing, and fixing sailboats. This is WRONG!!!

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    3. Bingo, Anon 06-16. This guy who runs the site Old (public record), and insane with desire to stalk an intimidate kids who are my daughters age. He is an ass-wipe. Get of this site. STAY off this site....leave him be in his own personal hell, okayh:

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  6. Anonymous at 02:13: So you're saying that you joined the sailing team to access 18 yr old girls? Must be something like that because the UW team sure doesn't win any races.

    This seems like it could be related to the child porn that was found on a Hoofer Sailing Youth instructor's cell phone.

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    Replies
    1. You just hit the nail so hard on the head, its not funny. The person who recovered the phone was driven out of the club, not the instructor. Reprisals for reporting a possible sexual crime title IX anyone?

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  7. OOF, I know who that is, he is a friend. He would clean house in a lawsuit if he wanted to.

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  8. Look, in the interest of justice can we at least have the Union investigate this? Look into it maybe?

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  9. the Union? Investigate? One of their own? Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaa....

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    Replies
    1. Sadly, you are correct. The union will not look into it. They don't care about justice, they care about expediency.

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  10. Just picking up on this thread. I got my degree from the UW in 1992. I was a hoofer, what the hell happened? Hoofers is gone. The union is discriminating, covering up and accepting muliti-million dollar donations now?

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  11. It's the University in general. It's no longer about sifting and winnowing. It's all about the Benjamins. Hoofer's serves to create a pretty backdrop for tourists. The new marina and facilities have been homogenized and pasteurized to appeal to the Union visitors and not the Union members.

    And, Hoofer's has a rich tradition of excluding African-Americans. This ensures that the lily-white tourists will not be upset by potential inter-racial Mandingo action among the sailors. But, I don't think that would give pause to the tourists.

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  12. You know, Tony Montana...it is not Hoofers that discriminates against minorities, right? Hoofers is ONLY a reflection of those who attend the university.

    Ever been to Mt. Zion Baptist Church to help feed several hundred Black people every Saturday? I think not. You ever done a food drive where people in that church want SOAP? Or underwear? If not. Then you have NO right to talk about anything that relates to race.

    As of last year, UW Madison had 43,504 students. Only 844 of them were Black.
    Hell, your ENTIRE Liberal City is onto eighty percent white! Let me guess, okay? You drive a Prius and think that Liberal life in Madison is okay, right?

    But you do not....COULD not know what it is like to be Black in this town. IF you did, you would be out there marching. You would be complaining NOT about Hoofers, but about the student population.

    Wake up, okay? Get your facts straight before you start surmising what you and your friends think is the truth!

    Swore I would never comment on this site again so that idiot who writes this, an OLD idiot, would perhaps shut up.

    But you crossed a line, my friend. A BIG one. Do NOT make up an issue to cover up a larger issue okay?

    Course you shall all slam me, but you know that thing in front of you with the screen? That Laptop that you parents probably paid for? Use IT. Learn. And try to understand what you are talking about.

    Wow....talk about covering up a huge issue with a small one. GROW up.

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  13. You just had to bring my Prius into this...the same Pious Prius I drive to feed the hungry and wash the feet of the masses.

    I am not the only one with a Pious Prius, am I? Anon drives through life using good works as credits to be traded against debits. That is a quid pro quo.

    This is one of if not the most racist states. Let's call a scow a scow and not go grandstanding ye opportunistic Anon who uses people to make himself appear superior on a blog board. Pfffft. Get a job.

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  14. It's all good, Tony Montana. So long as your Prius has a racing stripe, and those fire decals on the front quarter panels, okay? Or Lake Pipes for the drag-strip perhaps.

    I do NOT at all consider myself superior to anyone....you included. We are all on this journey to see and experience and think and learn....no matter how old we get. You you are dead on that this is a truly racist state, Tony, but only WE can begin to fix it.

    And A-Non? Know him well. He does do good works. Be in all the time I've known him, he has never expected ANYTHING in return.

    Enjoy the Prius...you seem like you may actually deserve it. But for shit sake, DO something! CHANGE something. FIX something. Tis easy to complain....far more difficult to fix. If it CAN be fixed.

    Be well....
    A-Non in disguise.

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  15. Never expected anything in return? Now I know exactly who you are talking about. And it is a damn shame what they did to him. The one man Who could always be counted on in any condition, any time of the night or day, broken foot or not. He was so happy to help anyone who needed it. What they did to him because he was a little "different" socially should be a crime.

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    1. You are off-base Jerry. He DID do some things for people he liked, but NEVER let anyone forget who he was and how he "sacrificed" himself for the rest of us.

      Do not want to rain on your parade for the guy, because he was not a bad guy at all, but he DID have a rather poor disposition.

      There are a LOT of us who show up every day to do good things to make this a better place. And choose never to be recognized at all.

      But WE do not need to be drama queens so that everyone knows how "great we are". We simply do what needs to be
      done.

      Not seeking personal gains, or favors, but simply trying to get this club to be what we ALL know that it can be.

      Hope you did not take offense....But I was not trying to make my point with any particular individual in mind.

      Be well...

      A-Non

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    2. I know what you are saying, eh? What happened was a damn shame. Im not on a crusade for 1 person, A-non. It is a symptom of a bigger problem.

      Hoofers is effectively dead. 1 other person seized control in the name of safety, started imposing his misguided rules, and people started dying as the rest of us knew would happen.

      We chased Tyranny out of this nation on 7/4/1776,and were warned specifically it would return riding a horse named "Safety and Improvement" I fear that horse is here in hoofers.

      We have given up so much to be more "Safe" and "Inclusive" that people are dying and being excluded... David Elsmo must go.

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  16. AnonPrious. I am just having fun on this board. What can I say except it is the Internet era equivalent of writing on a bathroom wall. We can both agree that Wisconsin as a whole can do a better job with race relations. Currently, African-American males are the raw input for the Judicial-Prison-Industrial complex. Wisconsin should be put on a do not travel list for people of color traversing the US of A. What is being done here goes beyond of the pale of human decency.

    We should be careful about making value judgments against people who have a different view. I believe you were making that against people who are into race cars, etc. Which is a dis against NASCAR fans. I get it. Not my cup of STP either.

    Cultural Supremacy is what makes Dems/Liberals unattractive. The snobbish superiority is right out of Kipling's The White Mans Burden.

    Only by dragging these issues out of the dark corners can they be addressed. African-Americans know what is happening, but do the whites comprehend?

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    Replies
    1. You know, Tony Montana....we might actually get along if we met, I think. For NO ONE can now what it is like to be Black in America, unless they have been there.

      You've a sense of humor. Your logic is sound, save for the NASCAR bit. Not a NASCAR fan but the world needs all of us, I think. My reference was made to an early teen car-culture in which people actually DID what I told you to do. Hell, I did. Got pulled over a number of times for it.

      Different generation, perhaps? In any event, keep after it. Do not let the writer of this so-called blog feed his opinions to you (I doubt he shall), and simply search for the truth, okay?

      Be well...

      A-Non

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  17. A-Non. Thank you. Good points about all of us elevating our game. I should not blame Hoofer's or the WI Union for reflecting the society they operate under.

    Overall the Club is a wonderful place. Many people have come and gone and put in volunteer hours and their extra contributions that make Hoofers a special place.

    Take care A-non.

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    Replies
    1. Right back at you. Should you have the inclination, read; American Prison, by Shane Bauer.

      It made me afraid to stay in this country, but proud of a man who took such a chance with his life.

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  18. That's an overgeneralization. It's "wonderful" for some, so-so for others, and a nightmare for more than a few.

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  19. Oh quit it Edward Teach, who is not really Edward Teach. The club is what all of us get together to make it.

    We can either be pissed off because we did not get our way, or feel horribly wronged that the club judged us in a way that we did not agree with something, or simply be contrary because all too many of us do not like change.

    Then there are the really negative people who will never agree with anything the club is, because they screwed up their chance to run it.

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  20. Fitshaiced ShailorWed Jun 26, 02:58:00 PM PDT

    How are the new floating piers working-out? How do you get a dinghy in the water? Is there a lift or just drag it back on like landing a shark by its tail?

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  21. Yup, no more carts, no more winches, no more wimps. Just grab that 200 lb. sucker by the tail, er transom, and heave it. Be careful not to slip or you may bruise or break something.

    It will be entertaining to see how people get Techs out of the water after being caught by a storm, and the piers are bouncing with the waves.

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  22. Anonymous above: That's why we have so many fleets! Keels for the out of shape (BMI > 40) and dinghies for the young and hale. It'll take a day time lulu of a storm to have the young 'uns riding the floating dock.

    Like lowering a dinghy on a slippery ramp and back up was not so great. Few bruised tailbones when falling.

    No. This Marina is a thing of joy and beauty. Let's show the ole Hoofer can do spirit and make it even better.

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  23. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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    Replies
    1. Because he does not want to hear the truth.

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    2. Your profanity-laced ravings had nothing to do with the truth. They were just an ad hominem attack, probably alcohol-fueled. If we had to guess, we'd guess that you're one of the club officers who have been criticized on here.

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