Tuesday, June 14, 2011

PIRATE'S DAY!

This Saturday... there will be m-a-y-h-e-m.

Come help us celebrate the lawlessness and abuse!

Get practice at hijacking and other terrorist acts!

Play bumper-boats and do things that would normally get you extra work hours (or worse).

Help glorify assault, rape, and other violent crimes!

Help us eat piggy!

It's Hoofer Sailing Club's Pirate's Day!

New this year: Our group photo for a big postcard to President Obama!*

Cost: $25 (not incl. extra work hours, fines, bail money, etc.)

*Just kidding--we don't want to be arrested by the FBI.

4 comments:

  1. Not wanting to seem politically incorrect, but men putting on make-up and semi-baroque clothing with the intent of plundering 'booty' seems a bit...what's the word?

    And when they cry-out 'Jolly Roger', there may a schooner ramming the stern.

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  2. Batten down the hatches it's Pirates Day 2011. Join in the ribald hijinks and debauchery at this Wisconsin Union sanctioned drunkfest. The weather should be great for an all day lets-get-smashed-a-thon followed by an evening of booty plunder.

    Event Highlights!

    •Ex-Commodore, adorned in eye makeup (so thick he resembles a John Waters drag queen) lurching and stumbling from under the orange awning as the self-appointed spiritual leader

    •Passing dogs lapping-up the sun-baked piles of vomitus spewed along the Hoofer lake front

    •Next day, men and women pumping-out their bilges wondering if the binge drinking blackout they incurred will appear on Youtube as a kind reminder of the fun. And a trip to the Campus Clinic hoping that that 'sword was sheathed'...and waiting for the test results.

    •And much, much more!

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  3. Really? The Wisconsin Union sanctions this sort of behavior? How much underage drinking goes on then? Does the head of the Union know about it?

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  4. Are you kidding? Of course the Union Director knows all about it, but he's a sleazy crook with much bigger concerns and can't worry about kiddie games like Pirate's Day, even if it does involve men in their 30s, 40s, and 50s providing copious amounts of alcohol to 18 and 19-year olds.

    ReplyDelete