Union Director Mark Guthier was caught recently by his own surveillance cameras, resulting in the photo at right, obtained earlier today by our operatives. Apparently, the spacing of the cameras throughout the building inadvertently created a Higgs boson induction array, revealing Guthier's true biology. Other Union staff including Jim Rogers, the security guards, and other individuals who have committed criminal acts or engaged in suspicious activity are now presumed to be interdimensional demons too, possibly minions of Guthier.
But does this really come as any surprise, considering the harm Guthier has wrought on students and other Union members since becoming director in 2001? Among other things, he forced a $200 million fee increase on legions of future students to provide himself with an enormous and unprecedented discretionary budget. We wonder what on Earth he could need so much money for. Perhaps to try to build a portal back to his own dimension..? Or worse, to abduct humans into it? One can only imagine what evil he is up to.
That's funny, I like the artwork. Guthier is far worse as director than Ted Crabbe, the good old days.
ReplyDeleteMore grist for the rumor mill:
ReplyDeleteOne of the J trailers was badly damaged on the Friday before liftout. As usual when something within the J fleet is damaged, Chris Frye was involved in this debacle.
There are no rumors here, only cold hard facts!
ReplyDelete